The secret to loving your breasts: A guide to breast massage

Every year October is an international occasion to bring the breasts into public awareness.

However, opinions differ in the intention of the month of breast health. In many campaigns we are informed about breast cancer. Instead of enlightening us about alternative methods of healing or preventive measures, we are presented with new diagnostic and treatment models. At the same time there is an effort to inspire as many women as possible to get mammograms and other early detection programs.

Since I have breast cancer in the ancestral line and my beloved grandma even had a breast removed, I feel called to look at the relationship with my breasts more deeply. As a Feminine & Sexual Empowerment Coach I like the idea to devote a whole month to the breasts.

Do you remember when your breasts began to grow?

I often notice that many women do not like their bodies and especially not their breasts.

As they grow your attention to them grows, and they also attract attention from others. Covering with clothing does not seem to help. In a culture of barbie dolls, processed photos in high-gloss magazines, and breast corrections, women, but also men, are already very early on suggesting how perfect breasts have to look. How big or small they should be or what form they should take and how tight they generally should feel.

If you begin to compare with other women, then you lose your inner connection to the breasts and can no longer feel their fullness and vitality from within. You can begin to believe that they are only there for others.

As a teenager I did not like my body and my breasts at all. I remember that it was very important for me to put my breasts in a beautiful bra with lace after the first flowering. Surely there was a certain pride in the fact that I am finally going to be a woman, without knowing what that actually meant. At the same time I also felt shame. I was ashamed because they were of different sizes and seemed not fit with the ideal image given by society. I did not know that this is the case for most women and did not know the beautiful variety of female breasts. It took me years to learn–and I'm still learning–to really love and accept my body and my breasts.

Stop criticising your breasts and start loving and accepting them.

Your breasts are the center of your love and femininity. They are by far the best food source for infants and the source of your own sacred sexual pleasure. Your breasts lie in the energy center of your heart, in which many emotions are stored. Also your breasts symbolize your capacity to give and to receive, as well as abundance and the nourishing qualities of nature.

How much do you nourish yourself?

This not only means healthy food and drinks, but everything that nourishes your body, your mind and your soul. Books you read, movies you watch, music you listen, cosmetics you put on your skin, thoughts about yourself and your life, people around you and the opinions of others.

Many women have learned to diminish their needs. It is easier for them to serve others. For example their family or a boss rather than themselves. Sooner or later this partial self-sacrificing behavior will be directed against you, weakening you or burning you out. And at this time, when you are not well, it is the most important time to nourish yourself. Enjoying just being and doing nothing at all without having a guilty conscience about it, asking for help, or taking help, are expressions of true feminine qualities.

I burnt out at the age of 28. I was physically, and above all emotionally exhausted. I had only functioned for others without feeling any interest or even joy in life. Actually I did not feel myself any more. My body made me very clear for years what it needs were and it was screaming for a break or a change in my lifestyle, but I simply ignored it. I wanted myself to be strong and endure anything under all circumstances. So I diminished myself, I did not nourish myself and I swallowed my emotions.

Can you let your emotions flow or do you have no way to express them?

A broken heart or an old pain can let you build energetic shields around your breasts. Suppressed emotions and tensions are stored in the body and make it difficult for women to feel their breasts from the inside. By allowing yourself to feel what is deeply in your heart, what is true for you, how you want to authentically express yourself, and by setting clear boundaries, this numbness will transform into your natural feminine receptivity.

Stop scaring yourself.

Especially if you have a personal or family with cysts or knots, you need to take responsibility for your body and begin to unconditionally love and accept your breasts. No doctor in the world can do it for you. It doesn’t mean that it is not important and sometimes necessary to get medical assistance and advice. But you are your own guardian goddess of your sacred temple. So listen carefully to your intuition and worship your body and your breast as divine.

The most beautiful and relaxed way to express your love for your breasts and to be in contact with them is breast massage.

Without thinking about suspicious changes you can feel your breasts and meet them in a caring and respectful way. Maybe it feels kind of strange for you at the beginning to touch your breasts consciously and lovingly. Funnily we are more used to someone else touching them than ourselves.

Meet them with curiosity and ease. Your breasts are an important part of your female knowledge and it´s worth it to feel them, love them, accept them as they are, and listen to them.

I invite you to feel your breasts from the inside. Take your favourite oil. I like organic coconut oil, but also rose oil resonates beautifully with the energy of your breasts.

Self-massage for your breasts:

Lay your hands like bowls lovingly around your breasts and allow yourself to melt with them. Take a few deep breaths and imagine that you are inhaling and exhaling through your breasts. Keep your fingers and hands relaxed and feel the space in between your skin. Breathe into all the sensations that may arise in your breasts and allow all of your emotions to be there. When sadness or tears come it´s totally fine and very common and a sign that this area in your body is beginning to purify and become more free. Let all your feelings be there and meet them with unconditional love–and without judgement–so you create a space for healing.

Your breasts are the extension of your heart center. Allow your breasts to be filled with love and ask them what they desire.

Imagine how your hands are full of healing energy. Feel how your breasts feel when you apply more pressure on the tissues. Make small circles around your breasts. Stroke your breasts in all directions. Try different qualities of touch and allow yourself to feel your breasts from the inside. Make big circles clockwise and opposite around your breasts. Shake them gently and notice the vitality of your breast tissue.

Massage the area under your armpit and inside the armpit where the lymph nodes are. The regular massage of your breasts stimulates your vitality, your hormonal flow and your blood circulation. It lets your breasts radiate. 

Women in my private sessions and workshops always tell me how relaxing, nourishing and stimulating the self-massage of the breasts feels. Some women even perceive their breasts as bigger than before.

While doing breast massage you will get in touch with your own body, your subtle female energy and your own sacred sexual pleasure.

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You will get to know your Yoniverse, learn delicious breast massage techniques and everything about the Yoni Egg.

From a tantric point of view the woman's energy begins to flow in the breasts.

The breasts are considered as a positive pole. From there the energy then pours its way into the vagina. And as woman you know that when your heart is not touched and open, if you can’t love and trust fully, it is difficult for you to open up yourself completely to an intimate partner.

Even if you have had a breast removed for medical reasons, the energy of your breasts is still there on a different level.

Follow your intuitive flow with the massage and remember that it is not important what you do, but how you do it. Be loving and present with yourself.

Create small rituals in the morning or in the evening. 5 or 10 minutes are enough. Put the oil next to your bed. Especially in the evening it feels very relaxing and pleasurable to let go of the stress of the day with a breast massage.

For most of the women I know taking off their bras in the evening is a relief.

Bras with underwire usually constrict the blood and lymph fluid circulation in your breasts. There are countless reports that bras, especially those with underwires, are unhealthy for your breasts and just as many studies that disprove this. Ultimately you can only find out for yourself whether your breasts feel most comfortable with or without a bra.

The more you are connected to your breasts and the more you learn to love them, the more sensitive and receptive they become. If you are already more conscious of your body and your breath through yoga, meditation or other forms of mindfulness practices, you may know how tight and uncomfortable a bra can feel.

For me personally with or without underwire in the bra makes no difference. Any bra simply takes away my breath. That is why I only have two strapless tubes for some transparent shirts and nothing else anymore.

Thank the goddess that the lingerie industry has followed the wish of many women for more softness and natural movement in recent years and now also offers a wide variety of comfortable–yet beautiful–bras without underwires. My breasts are the happiest when they can breathe and feel free.

And for men:

You can learn to enjoy breasts without forgetting their owner. Rather you can help women be satisfied with their breasts no matter how big they are or what form they have. It's a wonderful way to start making love by simply holding and lovingly touching the breasts of your partner with unconditional love. Try it out, I promise you will be surprised! 

It is fortunately never too late to change our way of thinking about ourselves and our behavior towards our bodies and breasts. Our body is always happy when we meet it respectfully and consciously and will respond with recognition in a beautiful and perhaps unexpected way.

I wish you so much pleasure in learning to love your breasts even more!